What drives children to behave aggressively?
Even though it may seem that way, a child is used to going through hard times. Many kids steal their classmates’ toys, hit, kick, or scream until their faces turn blue. A child is still learning many new things, like how to use scissors and talk in long sentences. She has a lot going on, which makes it easy for her to get mad at a playmate.
Your child will be choosing to leave for the first time to go to daycare or preschool. She will also get used to not being at home. So, the next person who bothers her might get pushed. Sometimes, your child might be hungry or tired. She doesn’t know what to do, so she bites, hits, or has a temper tantrum.
Even if a kid has grown up and has been to school, she might still have trouble keeping her temper in check. She might find it hard to listen, pay attention, or read if she has a learning problem. This could hurt her grades and cause her a lot of stress. Perhaps a recent divorce or illness in the family has forced her to feel more hurt and rage than she can take, and she can no longer do so.
It doesn’t matter why your child is being aggressive. She will probably outgrow it as she learns to solve her problems with words instead of her hands and feet. The key is to get her to see that talking things out with her friend is better than pulling her hair out.
How can I deal with my child’s aggression?
Provide an example.
No matter how upset you are, try not to yell, hit, or let your kid know she is bad. It would help if you didn’t try to change your child’s behavior by telling her that yelling and hitting are the best ways to show anger. Instead, teach her how to be a good person by keeping her cool and pulling her away from trouble when she needs to be.
If your child is acting badly, try to do something about it quickly. After hitting his brother three times, it’s a good idea for him to say, That’s enough! Even if you’ve told him off a lot in the last hour, it’s best to confront him when he does something wrong right away.
Then get him away from there for a few minutes. 3 or 4 minutes is adequate time for a child in preschool. If an older child gets angry, you might consider taking away a privilege. For example, you could limit how much time he watches TV or accept cash from his allowance. If he hits or screams, he won’t be able to do something he likes. This is the point.
Stay on your course.
Try always to react the same way when you see someone acting badly. Predictability will assist you in establishing a pattern that your youngster will come to recognize and expect. As time goes on, she will realize that if she acts badly, she won’t be capable of getting in on the fun. It’s the initial step in getting her to change how she acts. Stick to the plan, even if she does something that makes you look bad in front of others.
Communicate with your child.
Please wait until your child is calm, then talk to them about what happened. This is best done after he has calmed down, preferably within 30 minutes to an hour, so he doesn’t forget the whole thing. Ask him to tell you what got him so mad.
We get mad, but that doesn’t mean we can push, hit, kick, or bite. He might kick a ball, hit a pillow with his fist, find an adult to help, or tell his friend, “I’m truly mad because you took my book.”
You also can try “time-ins,” which are short periods when you leave your child alone (as opposed to time-outs). Please stop what you’re doing as soon as your child starts to yell and tell him to be quiet for a while.
It’s fine to put your arm around him or take his hand. Talk about it a little after you’ve had time to think about what happened and how he might have handled his anger better. When he learns this, he should be capable of comprehending and recognizing his feelings and thinking of other ways to show them.
He should also take steps away from people and situations that make him angry until he can think of something better to do than punch them. Reading books about anger with your child can help him deal with it.
Reward the right things.
Ensure you don’t only notice your child when she’s doing something wrong. Try to note when she begs for a turn rather than taking the tablet away or when she hands over her swing to another child waiting.
The greatest part you can do for her is to show her that it’s better to control herself and figure out how to solve problems than to push or hit other kids. Keep a specific calendar on the fridge or Helen’s bedroom bulletin board. When she keeps her cool, please give her a colorful sticker as a reward and tell her you’re proud of her.
As a parent, you must assist your baby in cleaning up after their anger breaks or make a mess of someone else’s things. He can use his skills to fix a broken toy or tidy up the mess he helps make when he’s mad. Don’t think of this as being bad.
Instead, believe it is the natural result of an aggressive act, which anyone would be obligated to do if they broke something. Your child must know that when he does something wrong, he should say, I’m sorry. Ensure he knows that, even if you must help him say it. When he says he’s sorry, it seems he’s not sorry. But you’ll learn the lesson in the end.
Watch how much time you spend looking at a screen.
In cartoons and other media for kids, there is a lot of shouting, threatening, pushing, and hitting. Try to do screen time together to ensure your child doesn’t watch or play too many shows or video games. This is especially important if your child gets angry easily.
Parents need to pick mainstream press for their kids that is good and right for their age, and they should only let them use screens for an hour a day. The group also wants parents to observe their kids and talk about what they see.
Obtain help if you need it.
Some kids have more trouble with being mean than others. Talk to your child’s doctor if their behavior happens a lot or is very bad, especially if it gets in the way of school or other planned activities. If it leads to physically hurting kids or adults, a child psychologist or psychiatrist may be required if you and the other person cannot determine what is happening and what should be done about it.
The anger and frustration could be caused by undiagnosed training, behavior disorder, or problems in the family or others. No matter what makes your child aggressive, a counselor can help them work through the feelings that cause their anger and develop strategies for managing them in the future.